Where is the hickey?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Oh god it's open bar.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize