smell my finger.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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