I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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