I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
