how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
