What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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