why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Randomize
