Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
