I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
