stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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