I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize