My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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