The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize