READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Randomize
