gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Randomize
