check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
