well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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