No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
