His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize