We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
