This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Randomize
