I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize
