So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
