South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i used baking grease as lip gloss
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize