sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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