I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize