My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Oh god it's open bar.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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