I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
