You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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