Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize