I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize