Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I am spending my child support on dildos
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize