sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
