if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
