The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize
