There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Rumble strips road head = magical
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
