Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
