brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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