I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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