Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
