Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
