Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
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