I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
