butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
