im gay
i know
yea but for you.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
