Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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