I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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