People with herpes should wear stickers.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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