remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
