I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
We have so much sex to catch up on
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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