I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
